Holding it all together

Or not. 

Sometimes we cannot hold it all together. It is too much. Emotions take space, and our biology has a limited amount of space. Squeezing emotions into a closed space will not work. Emotions will leak out and spill. This is why we cry, and laugh. And rage.

Because we have to move the emotions from our inner space to open up for different.

My emotions are brewing like a pot of chickpeas, about to burst the pot lip. 

Into the mix of a father suddenly going blind at 92 years old, his wife in palliative care, his affairs in a total mess, my mother moving, my daughter moving, family members coming for Christmas, a lovely young man from Italy accidentally reversed his car into mine this morning, writing it off. 

I am not holding it together well. One slight pinch and I feel the crack moments from gaping open.

I know distance running. Focus on the next step. Only the next step. Refuse to think of the entire marathon before you.

I exhale. The next step. Stay with that. 

Then the next. 

This too shall pass.

And crying and raging and laughing are all good options.

Photo Taken October 11th 2025, Article published December 5th 2025