In honour of anger
From my first breath, I have been feisty. Anger is part of my Pattern Integrity.
Little women like me, standing at just 155 cm, five foot one inch, are not ‘supposed’ to be angry. Women, in general, are criticised relentlessly for their anger.
Being bossy and outspoken are still frowned upon. Women criticise women for their anger, not just men.
Yesterday I read a quote from Alanis Morissette. “If there were a quality that I’d become a poster child for, I’ll take anger – because as a woman, the main emotions that we are, quote – unquote, not allowed to feel are anger and sadness. That anger is such a powerful life force. Anger is such a vital, powerful, light-filled life force. It can be labelled as feistiness or – in my experience – as passion, and it’s a kick-starter. Anger can kick-start many forms of activism. It can kick-start art. It can kick-start a scary conversation. It can kick-start someone setting boundaries. To me, anger is a gorgeous indication of something needing to change.”
I read this, and a small part of me that had been ridiculing myself for my anger exhaled.
I claim my anger. I claim that it makes people uncomfortable at times, that some people do not like it. Sure, I can work on appropriateness and consideration of my use of anger. Always.
This morning I read of the passing of the great Dame Maggie Smith. “Speak your mind, even if your voice shakes, “ she said. The comments section from people who knew her. “Sharing a two-shot was like being paired with a lion. She could eat anyone alive, and often did. But funny, and great company. And suffered no fools.”
These comments are written in admiration. I want comments like these when I pass. I want to stand for things. I do not suffer fools well.
Women, we do not need to be small men. We can be fierce, feisty and angry and remain fully women. We do not have to be mean or spiteful; we do not have to ridicule or denigrate. We can be loving and angry. We can be angry in service to something or someone.
We will not find our place at the world’s decision-making tables unless we claim our feminine version of fierce.
Thank you, Dame Maggie, for your glorious demonstration. Integrity in action.
Photo Taken September 28th 2024
