Get to know your saboteur.
We all have one. That part of us that throws a shoe into the gear mechanism of our life.
I have a friend who simply must have high drama around her. The drama carries the theme of legal battles. She lurches from one legal battle to another, major and minor.
Another friend manages to attract attention from the police. He is a trouble magnet. Even when he is not doing anything wrong. I must admit we are all entertained by the stories that he tells that could only happen to him.
Yet another lives and breathes the story of illness and health issues. Another form of drama.
My own saboteur until this time has come in the form of avoidance. I have avoided facing issues, specifically around money, finance and debt that I do not want to face. I could drag this out for weeks and months. Of course it is all ridiculous, as it is not to be avoided, so the daily pain just accumulates and starts inhabiting my dreams.
Getting to know the part of you who sabotages is a critical aspect of leadership and personal development.
If we do not know well our shadow, our shadow will rule the days and nights of our lives.
When does your sabatour show up? What are the circumstances that enable your saboteur? There will be a specific set of conditions, events and circumstances that are unique to you. How have you manged your saboteur in the past? What has worked? What has not? Why is your saboteur gaining by being in the game of your life? Attention, energy, love, connection, victim status that leads to attention?
If you could befriend your saboteur, what would you call it, and how can you integrate this aspect of self into your life? For unless we get to know and integrate the saboteur, this aspect of self will have a hold over us.
Great leaders know their saboteur well. They know when they are at their most vulnerable or ineffective. They surround themselves with people who hold them to their best when their default might be their worst. They can speak about their saboteur without shame. They create environments where their saboteur will not derail their lives or businesses.
Our saboteur demands greatness from us. It demands that we cross the mountain of our own undoing. It is not to be mistreated, but approached with respect.
Is this easy? No. It’s seriously hard. Yet this is the real work of being human.